Wednesday, May 28, 2008

the day everything ended.

today. tonight. tomorrow.
there'll be no more. i love her.
it is funny. how the fate twisted. over such a simple matter.
that we were to be seperated.
no more gigglings in the middle of movies.
no more scant glances at each other's eyes.
no more hand holding to walk down the streets.
no more getting lost, being led by her in marina.
no more breakfast, from her to me, from me to her.
so many other things all incomplete.
the puzzles. out of place.
then it rained.
it was as though the sky was crying for me.
the distant thunders that rumbled. as i stared up the sky.
as though sensing the vow i made.
it was crying in my place.
i wouldnt let go. if it were me.
but this time, it isnt about me. the decision is with her.
i don't wish to force her. she cant take the commitment.
it is afterall a status. but i dont feel good about breaking up.
but. in the end. i have to accept it.
i failed to protect her.
and she is tearing inside.
why though. am i still alive?
when it hurts so much inside, and i no longer feel anth in the chest.
why though, am i still breathing?
she's my air, and she's no longer mine.
why? am i still able to move.
when she is part of me. physically and mentally.
she thinks. it is her fault. the guilt.
i wont allow her to bear. not for me.
she thinks she is not good. and that im sick of her.
find me then, another fine thing to happen in my 20 years of life.
she was to be the finest thing to happen.
i had so many things in mind. so many wishes to fulfill.
to brighten up her days, and once again. bring her to life. to love.
i took her away from him.
i wont stop fighting. even if i were to be battered and bruised.
i will walk the death valleys with her. but. she's giving up.
its like trying to save someone bent on dying.
just take my hand once again.
if you would like to dance under the stars.
i would be standing just alittle up ahead.
waiting for you. always ahead. always waiting.